There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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