i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
