What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
