so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
