she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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