The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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