remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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