4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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