My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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