matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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