please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
