I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
