Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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