Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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