We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
