so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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