I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize