You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
