Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
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