Christians are straight up FREAKS
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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