My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
