I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
