Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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