5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
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I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
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He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME