one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
