I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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