sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
