ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
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