My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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