You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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