I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
You ruined the universe
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