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  • if i were you, i would have said "your credit card was rejected"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 15, 09 at 12:18am
  • I wish I could "bad night" this 70 times for you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 2:10pm
  • There should be a 'worst night ever' button. That is like taking a bullet. Sorry.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 4:17pm
  • I'm sorry..that is fucking terrible. If you texted me that I'd buy you a shot at the bar. Hell, make it two.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 31, 09 at 3:26am
  • Giggity Giggity alllllllll riiiiiight!!!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 4:16pm
  • 3:39, i'm a 22 year old woman who does NOT have a dry vag but warming lube is REALLY good during sex. maybe you should try being a bit more experimental.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 8:38pm
  • ouch!!! did you punch him in the face?!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 11, 09 at 9:23am
  • So, which one was the impulse purchase?

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 1:36am
  • 3:10, think about who the primary users of this site are. Probably people between the ages of 16 and 23 mostly. A lot of teenagers work at check stands. And Beyonce sucks anyway.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 3:18pm
  • 3:39... you should look into the workings of the vagina. every woman is different (dry/wet) and some just enjoy a little extra lubrication. OP: this is probably more than a bad night if you still have feelings for you the ex. i vote for you quitting your job

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 12:14am
  • omg that's awful...glad it happened to you and not me. lol.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 1:03am
  • "wow, where do you live where there is only one store??????? obviously that was on purpose" Clearly you have never been to the 863. :P

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 6:06pm
  • I managed a spencers for a while and that's happened to me plenty of times. Never made me bitter though, I've even helped ex gfs pick out vibrators. They always go for the one I say is closest to mine lol.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 7:19pm
  • haha thats priceless

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 20, 09 at 10:29pm
  • what the hell are you people doing dating checkout counter losers? as Beyonce said "UPGRADE" May 29, 2009 3:10PM ily

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 5:15am
  • she must have been in for a good night =)

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 12:00am
  • Ahaha... I've had that experience before.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 1:51pm
  • @ asimmers

    Submitted by norymarshall28 on Dec 28, 10 at 1:10am
  • Whats for dessert? ;)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 10, 09 at 5:33pm
  • awww thats okay she doesnt know what shes missing

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 19, 09 at 9:32pm
  • I was going to say how lame is chocolate frosting?

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 2:36pm
  • 3:39 - you must be on the younger side of the scale of people that visit this site. A little sex education may do you good. Good luck with that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 3:52pm
  • DITTO, ppl need to get educated

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 4:17pm
  • Awww that really would suck :( Poor you!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 1, 09 at 4:23am
  • sry... that has to be the worst

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 5:16pm
  • words cannot describe how shitty that must have felt. i'm sorry, man.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 14, 10 at 4:13am
  • I also would buy you a shot, b/c that sucks I'm sorry. Cheers to 3:26!

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 31, 09 at 3:43am
  • I don't think it's as bad as everyone is acting like it is. So what he moved on, now you try.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 5:26pm
  • should have done a price check June 1, 2009 11:00PM This. Flawless Victory.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 30, 09 at 1:06am
  • chocolate balloon fight?

    Submitted by orangecrush24 on Jun 26, 10 at 6:29pm
  • 3:39 obviosly has an extrmely small cack. eliminating the need for lube

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 4, 09 at 2:44am
  • wow im so sorry! that sucks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 4:15pm
  • should have done a price check

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 1, 09 at 11:00pm
  • Wow, worst night ever. Agree with 3:26 & 3:43, we'd be drinking all night.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 31, 09 at 11:31am
  • has happened to me and it sucksss

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 3:41pm
  • FAIL!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 12, 10 at 1:37am
  • Sounds like she is baking a cock-cake and her vagina is the oven.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 4:51pm
  • he DEFINITELY did that on purpose!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 9:14pm
  • hilarious....you have to laugh at situations like this

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 12:06am
  • lube is also great for jerking your boyfriend during foreplay. it aint good if it aint sliding

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 6, 09 at 6:44pm
  • word up! 8:38 thats whats up! f'n love it!

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 9:05pm
  • @ 2:57 What the hell does a woman need lube for? Her vag must be dry as hell lol unless you were doing anal (yuck).

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 3:39pm
  • "I wish I could "bad night" this 70 times for you. May 29, 2009 2:10PM" Obsessed. I agree. That blows.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 2:57pm
  • Yea that must have been a great Incounter.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 24, 09 at 4:22am
  • this belongs on the fml website

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 3, 09 at 5:01pm
  • what the hell are you people doing dating checkout counter losers? as Beyonce said "UPGRADE"

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 3:10pm
  • wow, where do you live where there is only one store??????? obviously that was on purpose

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 1:57pm
  • Wow lmao that's just out of spite lmao she prolly gonna pull a frosted alaskan pipeline lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 19, 10 at 6:52pm
  • Where is this from? Are the first 3 numbers like an area code??

    Submitted by raychelcoale on Mar 29, 10 at 7:43pm
  • That's so sad

    Submitted by cheesebiscuit on Jul 17, 10 at 12:05am
  • Good night...for him

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 26, 09 at 8:56pm
  • sorry you had to see us babe ;D

    Submitted by I_LOVE_JOO on Aug 1, 10 at 12:48am
  • falling in love is so easy thats why falling out hurts so bad and this dont help either

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 4, 10 at 11:11pm
  • i wouldve spit on the condom and handed it back

    Submitted by dudeyousuck on Oct 16, 10 at 7:35pm
  • This is on fml WTF??!!?

    Submitted by maxarama on Apr 21, 10 at 11:34pm
  • Deff on fml

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 1, 10 at 8:45pm
  • 5:33 - obviously pussy & chocolate!!! DUH!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 22, 09 at 3:27pm
  • who knows? she could've needed the icing for a cake?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 1:18am
    • and condoms to blow and use for decorating the room instead of the baloons?

      Submitted by mrMe on Jul 8, 10 at 2:54am
  • Worst. Night at work. Ever. Your boss should've promoted you to manager on the spot for your dedication to your job.

    Submitted by sprsnc20 on May 14, 11 at 2:08am
  • I agree with 5:26--it's NOT that bad. try walkin in on your ex, who is chained to the bed and yelling "harder papi, harder!" while being fucked in the ass by a 7ft. black man. now that sucks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 6:04pm
  • I bet the ex is lookin to make you jealous! Hard to delete an experience like that from your memory! Hey 4:53 GROW UP

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 5:01pm
  • This should be on FML.... Oh wait actually I think it ready was! Before you posted this

    Submitted by chelsea_mae on Mar 4, 10 at 4:23am
  • aww girl I am sorry that straight up sux! He's such a doush bag, thats just low

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 8, 09 at 10:56pm
  • In solviet Russia condoms sells you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 30, 10 at 9:41pm
  • This was submitted as an FML as well

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 30, 09 at 12:05am
  • I think I saw your ex post something about this situation on fmylife.com

    Submitted by Cheyrae156 on Aug 5, 10 at 2:20am
  • Three cheers for Arcadia!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 2, 09 at 9:19pm
  • That suuuuuuuuuucks. D: But what sucks more then that is being the only one on register at night. That is booring

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 8:41pm
  • Gotta love Lakeland. Hahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 4:33pm
  • dude im a chick and would know, she prob just did that to make you jealous. She prob just went home after that sat in front of the tv and ate that frosting.

    Submitted by asummers8 on Sep 26, 10 at 3:18am
  • i'm so sorry you had to go through that. hopefully u got the job after yall broke up & he didn't know u were working there. that would be a super asshole move!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 2, 09 at 2:58am
  • when you work at a sex shop thats bound to happen

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 09 at 6:01pm
  • You missed out!

    Submitted by cfreymarc on Mar 13, 10 at 6:24am
  • try hanging out with two of your gfs exs severals times and just find out!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 10, 10 at 5:15pm
  • Of course she's your ex...you work as a cashier, you deserved it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 12, 10 at 4:46pm
  • Oh my god..... No "first" posts....No "FAKE" posts.....Whats happening?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 30, 09 at 8:07pm
  • Is 863 the area code here?

    Submitted by raychelcoale on Mar 30, 10 at 8:38am
  • PUaHAhahS

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 24, 10 at 6:44pm
  • Haha I live in 863 lol who is it?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 23, 09 at 10:34am
  • Niggah! $(

    Submitted by youngmoney1 on Jun 14, 10 at 3:20am
  • Hahahahhahaha that sucks SOOOO f*ckin hard dude! You coulda hit that WITH chocolate frosting. Ugh. I like died inside when I read this. =(

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 9:49pm
  • well if you broke it off f u if not your life sucks. loser

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 4, 09 at 7:50pm
  • This is really bad sorry

    Submitted by Venus59 on Jun 26, 11 at 3:09am
  • I'd get sauce, not frosting...

    Submitted by pichu180 on Jun 28, 10 at 6:41pm
  • all of these posts and no one has postulated maybe she's just being psycho i wanna make you jealous ex? i'm surprised. i have NO idea what the case is, but all i know about this thread is that the young one who's wondering about why a vagina needs lube makes me smile- he may never learn.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 7:40pm
  • um... who says a guy wrote this? btw.... great idea! wish my ex worked behind a counter!

    Submitted by road2nowhere on Feb 12, 12 at 10:00am
  • It would only be awkward if Magnums were being bought

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 10, 10 at 5:05pm
  • It's funny because I don't know many girls who buy condoms for they're men, sounds like the cash register worker is the girl

    Submitted by weedweedweedweed on Dec 25, 10 at 7:33pm
  • Worse... I sold my ex his engagement ring when he was proposing to his girlfriend (now wife), worst day ever.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 15, 09 at 7:39am
  • dude, I am so sorry

    Submitted by PotLovingMF on Jul 17, 10 at 3:06pm
  • I'm sry, at least u did ur job...

    Submitted by cbtango on Apr 22, 10 at 2:31pm
  • I'm am soooo happy that happened to you. You suck. haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 4:53pm
  • Good ole Polk county for ya.. Wow I hate it here.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 12:10pm
  • Your ex is on here gloating about under best nights...lmfao!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 1:24am
  • sounds like someone is about to have a very happy birthday

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:22pm
  • You should have said " New boss?"

    Submitted by mrp1mpin on Aug 2, 10 at 11:19pm
  • Yeah, totally on fml.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 18, 10 at 12:13am
  • Oh that sucks ass! And are you getting any if not damn that's worse

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 18, 09 at 5:40am
  • Hahahaha that fucking sucks!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous007 on Jun 30, 11 at 1:15pm
  • Be glad she didn't get magnums.

    Submitted by 574willlee on Jul 24, 11 at 3:00am
  • sucks sorry to hear, if she didnt want to make you jealous (or get some type of reaction out of you) she would have seen you when she walked in and turned right around and left

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jun 10, 09 at 1:17am
  • Have any of you retards considered that maybe it's some ugly raunchy girl that this happened to?

    Submitted by cyanidepwn on Mar 19, 10 at 10:15pm
  • Sucks for u good for him

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 7, 09 at 12:13am
  • BAHAHAHAHAHAHA looooooooooser

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 6, 09 at 6:20am
  • the problem above all is were those MAGNUM condoms..I'd feel terrible...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 10, 09 at 1:50pm
  • work at walmart?....

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 2:46pm
  • I read an fml just like this one but it was from the others's point of view.

    Submitted by Jester733 on May 12, 10 at 10:07pm
  • I feel u bro

    Submitted by chummy on Jun 11, 11 at 2:53am
  • lol, dude who is this? i live in the 863. hahahaahha, sounds like my town! hahaha!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 29, 09 at 10:46pm
  • That fucking suuucks yoh ! Haha I got a good crack out of it though ! $:

    Submitted by TaylorMariisa on Mar 16, 11 at 1:12am
  • Similar story... My girlfriend and I were at the store and the only cashier was her ex. We were buying lube and a big bag of chocolate. Totally unintended.

    Submitted by Anonymous on May 29, 09 at 2:57pm
  • What size were the condoms? If they were small...the joke opportunities are endless

    Submitted by DtB1995 on Jan 2, 11 at 2:19am
  • haha bet you wish THAT relationship didnt end.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 27, 09 at 2:53pm
  • Damn

    Submitted by pyton911 on Apr 11, 10 at 8:24pm
  • I'd rather straddle a parking cone.

    Submitted by Atlus424 on May 8, 10 at 2:34am
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