dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
