I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
