Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
