Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
