Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
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when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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