I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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