I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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