6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
did i walk over a car last night?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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