my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize