Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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