I love black thongs
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
