one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
