OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
