I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize