question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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