I need help removing her.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
