Im at strip club and am horny
I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
