im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
